A Short Break from Winter

The last few days have been unseasonably warm and so we enjoyed the 70 degree warmer weather. We all enjoyed those few hours of running and playing out in the yard. This winter has seen temps at -20 plus and to see it in the 50's was a reminder that things do change. Things around here have been so so busy. Zoe has her 1st Valentine party at school on thur. She is so excited. We are trying to plan her birthday party before Zacs spinal surgery on the 2nd of Mar. I can't believe she will be 5 in just a few short weeks. Next week Zac has 2 days of specialist appointments in Indy. We are going to just get a hotel room and stay instead of driving 6 hours each day round trip. Zac gets car sick so I know he will appreciate that, but I will miss Z1 and Z2. Zeb is learning to use the big boy potty finally! Zac is really picking up the english and starting to bond to dad. If we didn't have all the Dr appointments and surgeries to deal with and insurance battles I'd say we'd be back into a routine and adding #3 was the easiest. Once we got through the jet lag and illnesses the road to normal started to smooth out. I didn't expect that for at least 5 more months. It's all the trips to Indy all the fighting with our insurance company that just make things feel out of control. We all long for normalcy. We long for warm sunny days to play at the park or go to the zoo. We long for Zac to be able to sleep all night in comfort and not get tired so frequently and not have to stop dancing or playing to rest because he hurts. We can't wait for his leg to be fixed so he can try to ride a bike and walk upright but can't because his leg is 6 inches shorter than his other leg. We long for the day when all of the unknowns are behind us. We long for the moment when they say Zac is clear and the other disorders they suspect are unfounded. We long to hear the words your son is going to be fine and we don't need to see you for a year or 2 to just check up on him. We long for the day when we don't have to seperate the kids to go to appointments and go to surgery. We long for the day that the insurance company does it's job and we don't have to fight with them to pay claims. We long for a time where our busy is t ball games, karate and dance class. I know our family is being pushed into our destiny very strongly. I haven't posted here in awhile because I am struggling to find the right words to say in the midst of this. Nothing in my vocabulary can articulate what is going on or how we are feeling. I hope when our family is thru this I can share our journey in a way that may help someone else. Right now I feel way to vulnerable to really pour out my heart for the world to see and judge. Please say a prayer for Zac and for us in the comming weeks and during Zacs surgery on the 2nd.