Where does the time go?????

I know I haven't updated in a little while, but in my defense 2 days in Indy a day in Ft Wayne, birthday party prep for Zoe and trying to get everything taken care of before Zacs surgery has me running in circles the last couple of weeks! Zac is really settled in with his siblings and Zoe is now his choice for comfort at the Drs offices! Zoe has really stepped up to the plate as a "Big" sister to her new big brother. I took her with me to Indy last week and to Zacs ultra sounds appointment this week. She helped the Drs get Zac to do what they wanted ( he hid under the table or chairs) She helped me haul luggage and played and distracted during blood draws. I am really proud of the way the kids behaved for me during 10 hours of tests and office visits. Zeb stayed with GB and daddy while we were gone and had a good time. Thank you GOD for GB I don't know what I would do without her in my life!!!!

We are waiting for genetic testing to come back in the next week or 2. The Dr believes Zac has a rare genetic condition and he is going to have to do some serious homework to get to the bottom of all of his anomolies. He has 6 or 7 so far we have found. He isn't ruling anything out at this point. It is disheartening when you hope for answers and get more questions or find more. Zac will have to have his leg amputated as soon as he is released from his spinal surgery so he has a chance to get used to a prosthetic before he starts kindergarten in the fall.

It has been a real challenge to stay upbeat and not worry over everything. I am thankful I am too busy to really sit down and think about it all. Mon is the big day for Zac. He has his spinal cord detethered. His ultrasound shows his bladder is not emptying even after he goes to the bathroom twice it is full. His stamina hasn't changed but he is getting harder to get settled down so I wonder if it is discomfort or he's getting comfortable with us. I so pray the surgery reverses the damage done to Zac. My heart breaks he had to wait so long for medical care. If we didn't have so many setbacks with his paperwork would his damage had gotten this far? As his mom I can't help but wonder and feel a bit angry that he had to wait so so long for a family.

I am learning a lot about myself through this test a lot about my kids my husband and my friends and family. I am learning with GOD we can do anything. When you feel at your weakest GOD really does make you strong. This is a hard time for our family right now but the other side is full of blessings. We will get to the other side and Zoe Zeb and Zac and any other children we are blessed with will be an amazing testament to the Love of GOD and that all things do work together to those that Love Him. Love does move mountains and 1 person can change the world. 1 small act can make a difference. We can be change. We can make a difference. Just step out in faith and believe in the power within. Thank you for praying and thinking about us as we go into the unknown. You are felt and you are Loved. We couldn't do this without you.